It seems that there's a funk going around right now and I've just fallen into it this month. As you might have noticed, my blogs have been less frequent lately and it's mainly just because I've felt so uninspired which is a new thing for me. I'm not used to this. I'm used to creativity flowing, passion for things whirling around. Not happening right now.
Part of it is the weather, I know. The temperature today reached 100. I hate August...always have. What a miserable month. I miss the rain, I hate the heat. It smothers and takes away and just drains every bit of energy. What I wouldn't give for October right now...my favorite month. It's coming soon. The only good thing about the heat is that it has meshed well with Love in the Time of Cholera which I am reading very, very slowly. It's a wonderful book, but a book that is to be read slowly and to be enjoyed in it's own atmosphere. I sit on my porch every afternoon reading a little at a time and feel the heat and imagine walking through the streets of Colombia with stucco buildings around me and the Carribean shore. I definitely recommend this as a summer read if anyone ever decides to read it.
The other thing that has me down is the situation with Megan being so far away and her mom's house being in such bad shape. I feel that there is not enough that I can do for either one of them. I want to be able to just make everything better, but I can't. I help in what little ways I can, but there are some things that are beyond my control. With Megan's mom, I know she appreciates my help with the yard and my visits and I really enjoy just hanging out too...I just wish that I could fix the whole house!! It's so unfair what this city has done to it's own residents. My mom is fighting too for her house and it's like running into a brick wall over and over and over again. No help, no answers, nothing being done. No one accounts for anything. It's unbelievable. Words can't describe our frustration down here. Our government down here is a joke. Every politician associated with this city has had their reputation so tarnished that it's no wonder we can't get any help. How can they find the time to help us? They're too busy defending the crooked choices they've made.
So I'm sorry for the lack of posts. We're halfway through the month and I'm still only on my second book of the month. I'm in a reading rut too. Hopefully this picks up soon seeing as I have nearly 20 books planned for the RIP challenge which is 2 months long. At this rate, that's not going to happen. Autumn should definitely cheer me up...it can't come soon enough.
I'm SO sorry for this horribly depressing post...I just had to vent. Thanks for listening guys :)
27 comments:
venting is good for you! now maybe you will feel more like READING ! yeah that's the ticket! READ! (never thought I'd say that to YOU of all people!)
:-) There's no need to apologize. Speaking as the King of Perpetual Funkiness, I hearby absolve you.
But I hope that things resolve themselves and you find your muse again soon.
Deslily...isn't it pathetic that I'm not reading!! I owe you a big apology there too. I'll be back to it soon. Hopefully tonight I'll fit some in ;)
Scott, Thank you oh wise King of Perpetual Funkiness...is that Sylvia Plath funky or James Brown funky?
I should hope so! I'm not paying you to sit and mope ya know! LOL
I know how you feel. The heat has gotten me down as well. It's just been sapping my mental as well as physical strength. My lovely wife also scared me to death this past week. I had to call 911 this past thursday morning and have her taken to the hospital. We found out she had a massive blood clot blocking her right lung and it had caused her to pass out and become unresposive to me at 2 am. She's home and much better now but she has a long road ahead of her in breaking down the clot and learning how to prevent them in the future.
Keep reading when you can though. It's my best medicene along with the many wonderful friends I have both local and on the net. As always I wish the best for your family and Megan's mother.
Oh God Jeff! I'm so sorry to hear about that. That's awful. I'll keep the both of you in my thoughts. I hope that things turn out ok. I can't imagine how scary that must have been for the both of you. Is there surgery involved in breaking down the clot? I wish there was something I could do to help you all.
I'll keep reading. I agree that it's the best medicine...Even if it's 5 pages a night, I keep it in there ;)
Chris -
Funks in the summer are natures way of slowing us all down, don't you think?
I feel for all of you down there. I've always been politically active but let me tell you, I'm getting pretty tired of all of them.
I'd say read but don't worry about quality. Relax and enjoy it, one page or 100.
cjh
That's part of what blogging is all about, IMHO - venting. I can so relate. I can barely talk myself into paying the bills. I keep putting a load of laundry in the wash and then it stays there, wet and molding, until someone says, "Uh . . . no underwear?" I don't want to blog because the computer puts out too much heat (and I don't feel like writing). And, I'm completely, thoroughly upset with the school system for sending the kids back out in the heat and allowing them to be penalized (in band, at least, the kids have been told they'll get an "unexcused absence" if they don't dress appropriately and go outside) for going out in dangerous weather at the hottest time of day. What's wrong with those people? Okay, gosh, ventilation day, huh Chris? ;)
You've sparked a flood outpouring from fellow funk sufferers! I think you're right on target with the collective funked out mood for the summer.
The heat is a great agent for lethargy. I was considering posting a venting post tonight as well, but in true procrastinatory fashion, I'm saving it for later :P
CJ, You always have such a great way of putting things into perspective :) Maybe Summer is telling me just to slow down.
Politics have just been horrible these days..I'm so disgusted by every politician out there so I just steer clear of all of them. It's hard to be passionate about politics these days isn't it?
Bookfool, Vent away, you make me feel not so alone...though I'm sorry to hear you're stuck in this rut too. Summer just sucks doesn't it...
I was in marching band too in high school and it was awful the things they made us do! I remember (not so fondly) having to dress out in full marching attire for dress rehearsal field shows at 3:00 in the afternoon in the scorching sun with absolutely no shade. And we'd stay out there for at least 2 hours. I played the saxophone, but I really felt bad for the Tuba players! Meanwhile, the "band coaches" are out there in their shorts and tshirts. It was awful. I can't believe they do that...why not make practice from 6-8? I suppose that would make too much sense.
I hope we both make it out of this soon Nancy...for now, tell them to wash their own damn underwear, lol!
Kim, I know! I feel horrible...it's like I caused a mass depression...now I need a happy post, I just can't think of one at the moment. LOL...I seriously considered saving this post for later too...I don't know what's worse, writing a horribly depressing venting post, or being so depressed that I put it off til later. Geesh.
Venting is necessary and should be encouraged! Particularly when it's about on-going things that build and build and build without any particular vent point being provided. You just have to pick a time and blast on in.
I'm not a heat fan either, and solve it by pretending I'm in a different country. Knowing that I hate heat, I 've never been to a hot country, but I can imagine them. I listen to Buena Vista Social Club and read books by authors from hot countries, and then the heat around me feels justified. I must say though the heat you have over there far exceeds what we get here.
I think summer funks (Plath, not Brown) are almost inevitable. I blame the academic year and weather.
Jeff, I hope your wife's doing ok.
I'm another person that spends summer wishing for autumn. I hate the heat. Last year in this country was unbearable for me, especially with M.E. - I had a really bad time. Thankfully this year we have mostly had rain and breeze, with very few days of actual hot weather (and yeah, I know, the UK's hot weather doesn't really pass for that elsewhere!).
So I can imagine how you're feeling. Last year in the heat, I couldn't do anything except lie around miserably watching films.
I really hope that something really good happens for you guys, in terms of the government miraculously getting their act together, or perhaps something at little less unlikely... For what it's worth, I think the way you're dealing with it all is admirable.
Venting is good, it's healthy, and we're all here.
Jeff - I hope your wife is ok, all my very best wishes to you both.
Bookfool - that is ridiculous! I can quite imagine that you're upset. :(
Dude no worries. I need to read Love in the Time of Cholera but it will probably be next year (I will aim for the summer cheers for the recommendation).
I hope things work out for you in other areas. Everyone gets in that mind set sometimes, it usually works itself out. Luckily I live in the UK so it never gets that hot, although I am sunburnt badly and spent last night being sick (possible sunstroke).
Sorry to hear you've been feeling down :( I agree with CJ, though - I think it's natural to feel this way in the summertime. Lately I haven't been feeling like reading all that much, even though I'm really enjoying the Murakami book, so I relate to that also.
And don't apologize for venting! Like bookfool said, blogging is about that too. We're all here to listen.
PS: Jeff, that's terrible! I'm glad your wife is doing better. I hope she recovers fully soon enough.
"We want the funk..."
Welcome to the ranks of the funkified! Sorry this contagion has spread your way as well. I certainly agree with your diagnosis that the asphalt melting heat we have been experiencing is one of the major causes of overall funkness.
Don't feel bad about it, we've all been there. Glad to see there is someone else who hates the month of August as much as I do.
And you shouldn't feel bad about the amount you are reading. It is all about enjoyment, not quantity, after all.
I was reading Megan's site yesterday as well as yours and I'm sorry for all you both are continuing to go through because of Katrina, distance, her mother, etc. Better days are ahead, my friend, better days are ahead.
It has been Attack of the Wives around here with Jeff's wife being laid up with the blood clots and mine being down and out for a couple of weeks with the mother of all severe sprains. Thankfully she is now the possessor of a heavy black robot boot and it back to work and feeling better.
It has been a strange summer, to be sure.
You're in good company!
I'm sorry to hear things are so hard. :( Family definitely comes before blogging!
Chris I think it's prefectly understandable why you may not be reading as much lately. The situation after Katrina is unfair. The administration has failed you guys - and Megan's mom - venting is good. Being upset and NOT telling anyone about it - that's unhealthy.
Take heart, okay?
Jeff So sorry about your wife. You must have been so scared. Hope she's feeling better. Please take care, the both of you.
You can't be in a worse funk than I am right now. Must be end of vacation blues. That and the fact that I am in a mass search for a new job!!
I just nominated you for a "Thoughtful Blogger" Award. Stop by and check it out!
Stormfilled, You're right..I'd go mad if I didn't vent every now and then! I'm starting to think that maybe I should just move to Europe ;) I seem to like it well enough from what I've heard and seen and the weather seems much nicer.
Quix, Isn't the heat just miserable! I can't wait for October to be here!!
I have no hopes for the government miraculously getting their act together, but I do have hopes for something good happening soon. As grouchy as this post came across, I do tend to be an optimist believe it or not, lol. So I'll just keep my fingers crossed.
Rhinoa, Thanks :) I highly recommend a Summer reading of Love in the Time of Cholera. It reads perfectly with the weather. Great book, I'm really enjoying it.
Oh no! Sunstroke is no good! I hope you get better...Drink plenty water next time you're in the sun!!! Listen to me lecturing you, lol...
Nymeth, Doesn't it suck being in a reading slump?! I'm not used to that. Glad to hear that the Murakami book is going good! And thanks :) Venting does indeed do a body good!
Carl, I can't STAND August...never could. There's just nothing good about this month. It's hot, there are no good holidays, and when you're a kid, it's the month they make you go back to school!
Megan's had a hell of a summer. I wish I could do more. Thanks so much for the encouraging words Carl, you're right.
You're wife too?! That's awful! I'm glad to hear she's doing better. What a strange summer indeed!
Heather, I agree, but blogging has definitely helped to keep my sanity thanks to the kindness of all of you :)
Dark Orpheus, Oh trust me...I tell people about it, they just get sick of hearing it, lol! So I figured I'd write it all down here and get it out of my head. Thanks so much for the support...y'all are incredible :)
Stephanie, Another funk buddy! Those after vacation funks suck! I'm in the mass job hunt funk as well...since I graduated. That's a depressing one, huh?
Aw, you're too sweet!
I was in band, too, Chris. We practiced at 6am. It just makes so much more sense to do the marching early, when it's hot. And, yep, we lost 15 people to fainting at one very hot band contest, so it's not anything new - musical kid torture.
I've tried, "Wash your own damn underwear!" It gets the funniest looks and an amazing lack of action (till day 3 of the same pair of underwear - amazing what lengths some people will go to).
Thanks for letting me whine right back. The heat is driving me crazy!!!
shit chris! i'm sorry to hear you're in a funk.
its horrid when things conspire against one - like having megan away and then it being so hot at the same time.
i hope you emerge from your funk soon - but if you don't, don't hesitate to post about it. we all feel like this sometimes and then we can sympathise/empathise with you and then at least you're not funking alone! :D
JP, Thanks :D I'll get out of it soon enough. Glad to know I'm not funking alone...that just sounds dirty, lol....
you durty dawg ;)
Thanks to all for the well wishes for wife. It's much appreciated. She continues to improve everday.
Chris - I hope your breaking that funk!
I am slowly Jeff!
Great news about your wife..hope she continues to improve. You both continue to be in my thoughts.
It's good to know I'm not alone in my Collective Funk. August, as a month, stinks. I'll take February in Chicago over August any day of the week. For me, the start of school is always the start of a new year, and therefore, maybe we're all gearing up in some way. Internally. Regardless, come on Fall's beautiful weather!
Right there with you Bellezza! I love the Fall!
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