Sunday, May 5, 2013

I Have Been... 5/5/13

I have been:

Writing: Apparently, not too much :p Blog wise at least. But I have been writing some things. Lots of emails these days. It's always fun making new connections online that you can see lasting for a long time :) The people who I would consider my absolute best friends in the world are people I've met online. The thing about the internet is, it allows you to meet people that you would've NEVER met otherwise...people who share your passions, your's a wonderful thing :) Aside from emails, I've been writing lots of postcards as usual through Postcrossing and I've also started keeping a handwritten journal again. Funnily enough, the journal was inspired by an essay in David Sedaris' latest book, Let's Explore Diabetes With Owls, which I still need to review. Yep..need to be writing reviews.

Reading: Right now, I'm actually only reading two books! The first is a nonfiction book that fits me and Debi's monthly themed reading. This month we're reading medical/psychological books. The book I'm reading is called Lamby by Nikki Polidori, a book about a mother who refuses to give up after her son is born with a barking cough with further complications who continually just gets passed from doctor to doctor with seemingly no help or hope. It's a great book written in a journal type style. I requested it for review because I can so relate, sadly. I don't have a child, but I've gone through the same thing with my migraines...doctors wanting to give you all these referrals and run different tests and change your meds every month. It's frustrating. The other book I'm reading is Gaiman's new anthology, Unnatural Creatures. Great so far!

Listening: At the current moment, I'm listening to Thom Yorke's "The Eraser" on my record player :) But I've been listening to SO MUCH GOOD NEW MUSIC! After meeting the new friend I was talking about above through Postcrossing, we discovered a common love of music and he sent me so much stuff that I haven't heard of before but I'm loving all of it! This is really good but could be really bad for my wallet in the long run :p

Watching: Too much crap really. Every day there's something new on the DVR to watch. The two things I'm really focused on right now are American Idol and Glee though. Both of which are about to end. I'm kind of pissed that Amber got voted off of Idol, but she'll do just fine going forward. I would LOVE to see Cree win. Damn that girl has a gorgeous voice. Candice too...that girl is going to have a HUGE career! A lot of people have been disappointed with this season of Glee, but personally, I love it. I love the New York story line with a passion. Everything about it! But this week is the finale. BUT! So You Think You Can Dance is starting again soon :D

Looking: Hmmm....for my brain to settle down? I've had this constant anxiety lately. I know that very much has to do with my life changing in a major way lately. Matt moved away less than a week ago. But I feel like I've been keeping constant lists in my head lately of things that I MUST do. Ridiculous really. I just need to chill. Also for time to iron...I'm looking for time to iron. Seriously, I have 19 things that need to be ironed right now.

Learning: To enjoy my time alone again. I was really worried that when Matt left I was going to jump into a huge depression. But I haven't thank god. Yes, of course I miss him. But I've been ok, and I'm trying to just take the solitude and quiet of an empty apartment as a place of peace after a rough day at work. I just need to not get TOO comfortable with it. I do not want to become a person who completely isolates and I know how easy it would be for me to do that.

Feeling: As I said above, anxious. I say I don't know where it's coming from, but I do. Giant life change. I say in my head I know how to deal with it and everything's just fine. Probably not dealing with it completely. Think of 100 things you can do to occupy yourself. Get anxious because you're thinking of all of the 100 things that you now HAVE to do. Truth of the matter is, the world will not end if any of these things don't get done.

Anticipating: Getting back into blogging. I have way too many book reviews to write! I really need to write them. I want to tell you all about these books because I've loved them all!!! I'll get to them soonish. Also anticipating next weekend! Because it's a three day weekend for me AND my birthday AND I'm going to see Wicked with my mom and sister on my birthday :D Yay!!

Wishing: For more hours in the day? A shorter work day? A month off of work? A way to instantaneously travel long distances so I can see people who I care about whenever I want to? You know....all things that can easily happen. I also find myself really wishing that I could somehow go back to my old style of blogging which I know isn't really possible :p I was reading through Dewey's old posts the other day which led me to reading MY old posts from the first readathon I participated in with her and all of the comments she left me and our old conversations and everything was just so much....lighter, then. The comments were happier, I did random giveaways of fun shit, my posts were written awfully, but they were also written like I just didn't give a fuck :p Well lets face it, they're still written like that. I just miss those days...

Loving: My family, my friends, and this community. Despite what I just said, I still love it :) I have some damn good friends in this blogging community. Oh, and the surprise 40 degree weather that we have here in May!


Beth F said...

Yes, I wish for more hours too. And balance. And time to do everything *right now*.

Jeane said...

I am hugely anticipating all those book reviews you will write! Sounds like you are doing okay, in spite of the rough times. I hope your quiet house is a happy one.

Susan said...

Oh Chris, I'm sorry that Matt has moved away, though it sounds like it was what had to be, in the end. *hug*

The anxiety - you are not alone in this, almost everyone I know including myself have been having strong anxiety attacks this month. I don't know if the Boston Marathon set it off, or if it's something in the air - it feels like change is coming, but what is it? where is it coming from? You've been through an awful lot lately, Chris. Maybe time all by yourself is what you need, so you can center yourself and let the lists go (except for the important things).

I'm so far behind on book reviews too, so don't feel too badly! I even have them piled up close to the computer to remind me they are waiting.....

I always want more time!!! Awesome birthday plans you have, too :-)

DesLily said...

I have never (ever) watched American Idol but I did this time because Keith Urban is on and he is just the cutest ! No matter the contest (singing/ dancing etc) the final 4 all generally make out well as someone always grabs up the talented people.

I always have anxioty ! Now I can add the fact that every time the weather is on the news they discuss the fact that hurricane season begins in June. so of course my mind kicks in that we haven't been "hit" in the 4 yrs I have been back in I begin to get all upset and stay that way all summer long. I have no idea where Boo and I could go when one comes our way. (and I live in a flood area) of course I try (TRY) to not think on it and read!

I am glad you are doing ok because you know I love you!
oh.. expect mail hopefully by your birthday!

Bookfool said...

The cold weather was amazing, wasn't it? We really enjoyed it. I'm sad that we're back into the 80s.

I can totally relate to your comment about the difference between your old style and new one. I've read some of my old blog posts and it was definitely lighter and more fun. I guess it just comes down to the fact that time moves on and we're not quite the same people we were, 6 or 7 years ago. Things change. I had a teenager that I was chauffeuring all over the galaxy and spent most of my day in a car, when I began blogging. I was surrounded by kids and they were hilarious! There was so much to write about! My life is really quite boring, these days. Like you, I've been going through an adjustment time. I had finally found a book group, a friendly gym and a great Bible study group and then . . . we moved.

We needed to move because the house was dreary and we were miserable, but it was horrible suddenly being all alone (except for the cats -- and I do find that I talk to myself a lot, these days) most of the time. It's going to take me a while to meet people in our new area, I'm sure, but I've finally at least become accustomed to being alone with the kitties. I accidentally locked Isabel in the laundry room, tonight. You should have heard the howl.

Anyway, babble babble. Love you bunches. I'm glad you're doing okay. It takes a while to get used to the quiet but sometimes a guy just has to go out and talk to his lemon tree. Where do you get lemon trees? I need one. I should probably email you.